


The Homestuck Afterwords: Side Candy 🍬

by StepperOfTheLongEarth



Series: The Homestuck Afterw@rds [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anthropomorphic Characters, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Canon Compliant, Canon Divergent, Canonical Character Death, Crying, Death, Developing Relationships, Dorks in Love, Earth C (Homestuck), F/M, Family Dynamics, Fascism, Forgiveness, Friendship, Furry, Guilt, Implied God Teir Powers, Interspecies Relationships, Kissing, Long-Term Relationships, Manipulation, Mental Illness, Meta, Meta Bullshit, Metafiction, Misogyny, Multichapter, Non Epilogue Compliant, Nonbinary Character(s), Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Other Ships Not Mentioned in Tags, POV Third Person, Past Relationships, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck), Political Intrigue, Political Rebellion, Post-Canon, Post-Sburb/Sgrub, Problem Sleuth references, Revolutionary Rhetoric, Robots, Sadstuck, Self-Sacrifice, Sexism, Tags Contain Spoilers, The Homestuck Epilogues, The Homestuck Epilogues: Candy, Toxic Masculinity, Unhealthy Relationships, Unrequited Love, Weird Plot Shit, World War, Worldbuilding, epilogue compliant, established relationships - Freeform, identity questioning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2020-04-23 06:04:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19145038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StepperOfTheLongEarth/pseuds/StepperOfTheLongEarth
Summary: A continuation of Homestuck after the Epilogues.This duology of Homestuck Fan Fiction can be read in any order: Candy 🍬 or Meat 🥩.Updates should be one Afterword per side. (Like how each of the Epilogues Candy and Meat contained eight smaller epilogues) Ex. Candy Afterword 1 Ch.1, Ch.2,...End of Afterword 1 -> Meat Afterword 1 Ch.1, Ch.2, ... This is intended to be the same work regardless of how the number of the series is displayed.Side Meat will be starting in the near future.





	1. Demidog's Done Dirty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **In which:**  
>      ☞ A dog is kicked.  
>     ☞ A girl has a rather deserved breakdown.  
>     ☞ Something grimbark this way comes.

  
**_“Dogs die. But dogs live, too. Right up until they die, they live. They live brave, beautiful lives. They protect their families. And love us, and make our lives a little brighter, and they don’t waste time being afraid of tomorrow.”_** _  
**– ~~Robert Louis Stevenson~~ Dan Gemeinhart  
**_

CANDY  
AFTERWORDS ONE

1

Jade Strider had waited a long time for her husband to come back. Here they were, looking at yet another shitty liberty, and he had gone off somewhere. Maybe...he was tired of looking for these dumb statues? No! She chided herself, Dave Strider would get tired of digging up ancient liberty statues when the sun went supernova. She waited just a little bit more, admiring how the day was rather pleasant and the weather great. It should be dark and ominous what with the war handing over their heads. Finally, she couldn't take it anymore and began exploring the nearby region calling out for her missing husband.

JADE: dave? DAVE?? where did you get too?

She didn't hear anything, which was worrying. There should be at least a mumble or a long drawn out ramble that could be heard for miles around, you just had to listen for long enough and sure enough one of Dave'e monologues would be bound to point you in his direction. Instead, the crushing sound of uncaring silence. Jade felt a small prickle of fear down her the back of her neck. Her brain started listing out all the worst possibilities: Jane's Army had found them! Lord English had come back too kill them all! Karkat had come to announce his true feeling for to Dave!! OK, that last one made her stop in her tracks and think about it for a few seconds. Where had that thought even come from?? When was the last time she had even thought about Dave and Karkat together? Did she...wait...was that..? No...

JADE: you have got to be kidding me. the white house?? the mother fucking white house??   
JADE: dave, you are going to be insufferable after this

Shaking her head at the fact that Dave's head cannons, that he had told anyone who would listen about crazy secret SBURB sessions and Hero Player Presidents, Jade slowly walked up the building covered in foliage .  
      She didn't know why she had been worried. If he had found THIS after all this time fantasizing about it, OF COURSE he would be in there deep! he was probably looking through old musty statues of something...  
      Then she saw it: the transportalizer. She was all too familiar with this device as SkaiaNet had invented them. or at least her grand father had stolen enough gizmos to backwards engineer the technology. She stared down at it with some trepidation, now completely confused. So....he had been right?!? How on Earth C could that possible be true?? Didn't Post-Scratch Earth just have like juggalo presidents or something like that? Jade wished that she had payed more attention to Dave's long ramblings about his counterpart from the other Earth, or rather this Earth.  
      Shrugging, because what else was there to do, Jade stepped onto the device. She was teleported away immediately. The Witch of Space stared in awe at the familiar Prospite colors surrounding her and then to her even further consternation: the god tier outfit, for a Hope player. Well shit, turns out Obama was real after all.  
      Jade called out into the crypt.

JADE: helllllllooooooooo? dave?? you there?  
JADE: did you find the ghost of obama and start making out with him or what??  
JADE: dammit where the hell are you???

Her foot clanged against something. Looking down, Jade could see a button on the ground. She didn't know what it could be and it looked like whatever powered the thing must have run out of power ages ago. Out of the corner of her eye, she thought she caught a glimpse of something bright and moving and whip around quickly to spot....!  
      There is no one there. There was, however, a very evidently walkway that, anyone spending any amount of time with Jake English could tell, was a secret passage. Cautiously, Jade flicked on her flashlight, walking slowly down the dark corridor. She didn't know why but she was filled with dread. The continued silence of Dave and the very place he had been gushing about where his idol had come from. Something was not adding up. 

JADE: dave? ha ha ha! this isn't funny anymore!  
JADE: are you going to jump out and scare me again?!  
JADE: because if you are im going to hit you so hard it will hit you into next...week...

She spotted something on the floor next to an open section of the hallway. She cautiously approached it and then recognized the still form for what it was. 

JADE: ha ha ok make believe time is over!  
JADE: dave? please start breathing. oh god please breathe.  
JADE: OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD

Jade had knelt down and started feeling for a heartbeat. There was none. Dave was a cold as ice and as dead as a door nail. The cool dude of her dreams was a corpse once again and this time, smooching it was not going to bring him back. She held him in her hands, the fear quickly replaced by grief. Tears begain rolling down her cheeks falling onto the dead man's face. It looks so unfamiliar to her. Why did a face she had known for her whole life seem so foreign to her at this moment?  
      She blinks through the tears as realization hits: his glasses. Why isn't he wearing his glasses? He never took those off for anything, not for showers, not for pictures, not even when he went to bed! Trying to put aside the awful thought that she once again will have to sleep all by herself without that face looking back at her from the other side, Jade looked down at the floor, wondering if they had fallen off. They were not there. Neither down the hall or in the odd alcove next to her. She spared it a glance and wonderd at the odd bits of machinery still inside. Jade discards that thought. Who fucking cares about some old dumb robot parts? Who FUCKING cares about whatever dumb thing was here at the white house??! WHO FUCKING CARES ABOUT ANY OF THAT FUCKING GARBAGE?!?!?! Dave was dead!!!! That's what mattered!!  
      Jade checks Dave over, crying in earnest now, tears splashing against her glasses. How had Dave died?? Nothing seemed to be physically wrong with him. There was no cuts, bruises, or any poison that her dog like senses could detect. Was it a heroic death?? Was there some terrible creature that had come to kill them all and Dave had fought it?? No, still nothing to indicate that anything had touched him. He would be in perfectly good health, apart from the fact that he was DEAD!!  
      Her eyes were too full and her glasses were too wet to see him properly but she leaned down one last time to him and kissed him anyway. Wasn't the first time she had kissed Dave's corpse and this time was somehow worse. He was cold, much colder then he should be but a lot less bloody. She supposed she was grateful for that at least.  
      Jade didn't remember what happened next. From what Rose told her was that she had come flying into their council room where they had been discussing their next attack against Jane, with the bloodless corpse of Dave. (It was remarkable really, since nobody could figure out how the fuck Jade had even found the meting, as they had told no one of the meeting or it's location.) And it had taken the combined efforts of a very distraught Karkat, Rose herself who was trying to hold back tears of her own, Kanaya, AND Meenah contributing in her own way; to get the dog girl calm down enough to tell them what had happened.  
      Jade was starting to go a bit numb from this. It was as if her whole world had dissolved. Her whole life had been wrapped around Dave recently. They had gotten married for God sakes!! They were soul mates! And he had just left his life forever. She vaguely recalled asking, no begging, Rose not to tell Roxy because she couldn't handle another funeral. Rose had cracked a very small smile at that and told her that she would hold off on that for a while. She couldn't remember how Karkat took the news, but if her memory was right they had both been hugging each other sobbing and him telling her that he didn't blame her, not for this. Not for everything that had been between all three of them.  
      She had fucked up things so bad between those two. John had been right! Why on earth hadn't she listened? Her whole life seemed to be just an afterthought now. What was she going to do with it now? Dave was gone and there was no way to get him back. Certainly not go to Jane, not with the war happening. Besides, she doubted she could have done anything for him anyway. Jade had lost a lot of faith in her ecto-mother over the years, what with the genocide attempt and not being able to bring back that other version of herself.  
      Once again she looked down at her hands, thinking of how poor Dave had been in them just a few hours ago. She tried to recall the last thing she had said to her. What had it been?? He told her that he loved her. She had kissed him and flown off and now she was never ever going to see him again. The little golden ring sat on her finger reminding her that Dave was...  
      She was about to start crying again, hands to face sobbing when she felt something cold, hard, and vast hit the bottom of her stomach. Jade suddenly felt very, very cold. Her hands had begun to take on a quality that she had seen herself do only once, during a trip to the green sun. Through her hands, she saw galaxies. A voice (her own voice?) began to speak. 

JADE: he may not be dead.  
JADE: yes he is! his curtains have been closed! his clock has stopped! his time has ran out! he! is! dead!  
JADE: and yet, where are his glasses?  
JADE: who cares about those stupid glasses?!  
JADE: i hated those dumb things anyway!!  
JADE: he was just so happy wearing them all the time!  
JADE: no you didn't. you thought they made him look cool.  
JADE: you always thought he was cool.  
JADE: yeah...but hes *sniff* hes..*sniff*  
JADE: no please me...  
JADE: DEAD!  
JADE: boo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo  
JADE: please try to calm down.  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: woof :'(  
JADE: i think there is something that i have to do.  
JADE: *sniff* what does it matter??!  
JADE: here i am talking to myself because  
JADE: HEY! no. i just said he might not be.  
JADE: *sniffle*  
JADE: no.  
JADE: *whimper*  
JADE: NO. BAD.  
JADE: aaaaaaaBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: NO, FOR GODS SAKE WILL YOU SHUT UP AND PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER, YOU ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY  
JADE: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH  
JADE: I SAID PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER YOU BLUBBERING GODDAMN PANSY  
JADE: AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: JUST SHUT UP. DRY YOUR CRYBABY EYES, LISTEN TO ME, AND STOP ACTING LIKE JADESPRITE!!!!!!!!!!!!  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: SHUT UP  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: NO  
JADE: JUST  
JADE: GOD DAMN IT  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: PLEASE  
JADE: JUST ONCE  
JADE: SHUT THE HELL UP  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: SHUT UP  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: SHUT  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: THE  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: FUCK  
JADE: BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO  
JADE: UP  
JADE:   
JADE: gggRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!  
JADE:  BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK!!

Jade was on her feet, her face turning as black as her old Witch of Space outfit. Her green eyes clouded over, becoming pure black on black in white. Now that the green sun no longer existed she could no longer draw on it's power, so it did not now lay within her eyes. If she were to close them, she would not see the spectacle that the cherub had destroyed. But the mass of two universes had to go somewhere and that somewhere just happened to be down a very deep black hole. The exact same one that, even if Jade did not know yet or rather the Jade of a few hours ago, Earth C was sitting at the bottom, as a dumping ground and refuge from the destruction of Paradox Space. Jade reached out to that energy, all that space filled her up and up and up until she didn't know where she ended and the space began. It may in fact have no end or beginning. She had become Space Incarnate. It was cold, and dark, and very, very angry.

JADE: now. let me think this through.  
JADE: dave would never taken off his glasses and he is dead.  
JADE: so either someone killed him and took his glasses as some trophy  
JADE: or he still has them somehow.  
JADE: maybe there was a full robot with all those robot parts in the wall to go with him.  
JADE: i had my own bot remember?  
JADE: so dave is possibly alive in some soulbot somewhere or his killer is still at large.  
JADE: either way there is some things i need to do.  
JADE: i have been a good girl for all my life.  
JADE: i didnt complain about how my grandfather was killed and left me with just my dog to raise me.  
JADE: i didnt shout about how my dog never took me to see my friends for all that decade he could have done so.  
JADE: i didnt grumble when everything in sburb kept pushing me away from my friends.  
JADE: and then when i finally did met them i killed dave thanks to jack and had to kiss him to make sure he stayed alive.  
JADE: i didnt even have john for those three years i was forced back to be by myself!!!  
JADE: i barely got to contribute when i did met them and perhaps not at all in the end.  
JADE: so here we are twenty god damn years later and yet another person i love is taken away from me?  
JADE: well no more!!  
JADE: i am done with being the good girl.  
JADE: i am done with being miss perfect jade, jade who has to sleep all the time because of some girl who thinks she wants to be behind every problem just to be the solution.  
JADE: i am done with watching my friends and their friends die over and over again.  
JADE: there is some invisible riddler out there that has it in mind that they hate me and have stated loud and clear that my life will be misery forever.  
JADE: so i am going to start  
JADE: fucking!  
JADE: shit!  
JADE: up!  
JADE: until i get some god damn answers!!

Jade had stopped crying. She was done with crying. Her eyes are free from tears and she intend them to stay that way. She didn't hear the little sobbing voice anymore and why would she? It was her own voice after all. This whole ordeal has made her realize that she had been on her ass for the last few years on pretty much everything. And she thought that was about damn time for her to do something about it

JADE: i first need to pay a trip to calliope.  
JADE: i need to get something from her.  
JADE: and then!!

Jade smiled a rather evil smile, one that did not suit her at all. But then again, as is clear to anyone with a brain, she had lost it. She had gone completely grimbark. 

JADE: then i think i will see about a troll girl who thinks so highly of themselves.  
JADE: i want to see if she wants to be important again...  
JADE: the vriksa i knew would love that.

> [(== >) ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19145038/chapters/48006688#)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me your thoughts.
> 
> Comment, kudos, complains, condolences, cha-cha real smooth, change, and all others appreciated.
> 
> Ask me questions and stuff I don't bite. (much) :V naknaknaknak


	2. One Winged Angel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **In which:**  
>      ☞ Alternate universe she-Hitler peaces the fuck out.  
>     ☞ Moon traveling at high speeds almost kills a bird.  
>     ☞ A friend is let down.

**_"I'm not locked in here with you, you're locked in here with me!"_** _  
**– ~~Rorschach~~ Alan Moore, Watchmen  
**_

2

You are now Davepetasprite^2. But really who has time to say all that? Not you, as you are currently falling through a black hole with your claws jammed into the armpits of an unkillable skeleton demon. He tried a few time to twist around and burn you with his deadly rainbow lasers, but you are positioned in such a way he can reach you. It is pretty entertaining watching him dance around like a marionette without any strings, he seems almost lost without being able to kill or destroy anything. He looks pretty pathetic honestly, you would almost feel sorry for him, if not for the fact that it's LORD FUCKING ENGLISH!!  
      After your initial bout with him and then your triumphant return to banish this asshole into the black hole you are starting to feel a bit tired. You are not sure how long you can hold onto this bonehead for or even if you want to. What would be the point? You did it! You put the green monster into the black hole! So...now what? You thought that maybe everything would fade to black after you crossed the event horizon or maybe one final few moments as the demon tried to get free of your grip while you went off to the great beyond or wherever it was that sprite ghost went to...you suppose that you would be a ghost in the dream bubbles somewhere? Maybe not since English here went and destroyed them all. But none of that happened, excepted for the struggling with the demon part and that was lasting far longer than it should.  
      The black hole is a featureless vortex of black waves seeming to go on for infinity. You hope that doesn't mean that is what you can expect for eternity, endlessly clinging onto this jackass. Although that was your plan to kill him but just not for the rest of forever. You wonder where this wormhole (is it a wormhole? god damn it. cherubs were snakelike things right? maybe the muse had made one of those) even goes, if it goes anywhere. It shouldn't lead to anything...so...the void perhaps?? You are not this prone to being philosophical about the relationship between abstract plains of existence in your reality but your mind tends to wonder with all this semi-air wrestling that you are doing. It gets BORING after a while!  
      Lost in your thoughts you almost didn't notice that the mostly featureless expanse is no longer without features. You blink a few times to make sure that you are not going a bit crazy from the exhaustion that is setting in. A bit bellow you and what seemed to be miles off if distance wasn’t a thing that long ago seemed to have lost all meaning was what looked like a large broken white sphere of sorts that was large enough to be a building. Even English stopped thrashing around to stare at it nonplussed. You fell past it and low and behold it wasn't just the size of a building, there is quite a large structure attached to the base of the orb, it was green and somehow the windows were still intact. The structure itself seems to be cut off with only a few floors remaining. There was something weird and creepy about the place that you can't lay a paw on why it is wrong.  
      Then out of the floating shards of the white dome a face appears. With a grinning face and braids streaming behind her Meenah Peixes is holding up a ring in front of her. She puts it on and her eyes return to their former fuchsia selves. Just as she is gloating over her pilfered prize she spots you and probably more importantly the green skeleton man that you brought with you.

MEENAH: ah S)(-ELL nahhhhh!!!  


That was all she said before she disappeared back into the building. English tries to aim his mouth at the spot where the Thief of Life was but you dig in and point him back to where you fell from.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< oh furk no you dont!  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< wow that was supur lame  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< "furk" really? i can do way better then that  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< hey! what do you think you are doing you overgrown man-child?  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< no more double death fur you!!  


Lord English lets off a laser blast anyway, propelling both you and him down from the mysterious building. You watch it disappear and out of sight in the gloom. You hope Meenah is OK, you never met her but one of the Dave's did and some of the Nepeta's did too. She thought the thief was funny, although she could be pretty scary sometimes. Maybe it would be best just to hope for the best and move on. Not that you have a choice in the matter, thanks to the demons antics you seem to be falling faster now through this abyss. You really should have hit some sort of terminal velocity by now but perhaps that didn't exist in a vacuum black hole thing that sucked up all of reality and the laws that governed them few rules that even applied in the furthest ring.  
      You here a piercing whistle and looking over your shoulder as you are now falling ass backward into this pit you see coming up behind you something large and purple coming at you at high speed. You do a barrel roll to try to avoid the object. Some internal part of you argues that it is not called a barrel roll but you are too preoccupied with trying to about the mystery missile then to correct that word choice. English isn't too happy about the somersault he just did and a loud roar issues from him. Man what a baby. You look back as the speedy object leaves your vision and have just enough time to make out some jutting spires and a trailing broken chain. And then it is gone as if it had never been there.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< hold the furk up.  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< ok nevermind i will use 'furk' ever chance i get that is hairlarious  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< but that was prosipits moon  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< it had like the chain and everything  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< where the furk did that come from?  


English gives out another roar in reply.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< well exxxcuuuuuussss333333 me english!  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< trying to make conpurrsation here  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< no n33d to get so meowthy  


The demon lets out an audible groan.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< what that was a furtastic pun  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< unbelievable  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< lord of time more like  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< the lame of yawn beclaws of how boring you are!  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< there was a weird thing that almost hit us and all you care about was destroying it  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< you can at least take the time to appureciate the small things  


The skeleton pimpster goes back to roaring.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< s33   
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< this is why no one likes you  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< you are a terrible conpurrsationalist  


Davepeta blinked as they felt something leave them. Evidently while they had been gawking at architecture and trying to get a conversation going with the time traveling abomination they had passed some invisible line that marked the difference between...something. Relevance they guessed. English didn't seem to care as he kept twisting about. The last few encounters had spiked some adrenaline into the double sprite but now that the moments had passed, weariness was starting to set in again. Eventually, English would catch them unawares. But that was always the case with this guy, he was always fucking there. Not anymore though! Ha! Even your ominous messages of your always arrival were wrong now! Take that English!!  
      Davepeta thought they saw something else in the corner of their eye. It was black on black but it was dropping fast. They prepared themselves for the next dodge or turning the skeleton tank around to avoid blasting whatever it was. Then the outline came into sharper focus and they saw who it was. Jade!! She was like a falling angle with a piece of shrapnel in their torso blood oozing from the wound. Davepeta didn't know which Jade this was and that didn't matter, it was Jade!! And she was hurt! They needed to do something about it! How though?? They're hands were a bit preoccupied at the moment with steering the USS Fatass and the moment they left the pilot seat the ship would turn around and start eating them like in some dumb horror movie!!  
      They maneuvered the lord over to the falling witch, trying not to tip off the demon that there was something else to destroy. Davepeta was right below the falling dog girl now, so close yet unable to reach out. Maybe they could use their teeth? Grab her godhood and then but her in between themselves and English? Then they could try to get that splinter out of her! They tried to go for the bite but the angle was just not right and the mad demon was jiggling around too much to get a proper grip. It was no use, they would have to try for the one hand catch.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< alright  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< you can do this  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< fur jade!  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< thr33  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< two  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< one  
DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< meow!  


Davepeta pulled out one of their claws and reached out for their falling friend. Lord English was waiting for it. While the double sprite was psyching themselves out for the maneuver, he must have figured out that they were up to something and prepared to fire. Just as the claw left the demon, his head turned and shot another rainbow light of death as close as he could get to them. It had been the wrong side, so instead of getting the sprite full blast, he clipped one the flashing troll/humans wings.  
      Davepeta gave a yelp at the pain. Why the fuck did those feathery asshole appendages have fucking nerve receptacles!! GAA!! In their moment of agony their reaching hand that was so close to Jade touched her and instead of grabbing her like they intended, their open palm pushed her down, sending her farther down and out of their reach. Cursing colorful cat profanities Davepeta, jammed their claw back into the demon causing yet more roars from the beast.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33< oh just shut up  


They positioned them once again so that Jade was nowhere in the line of fire if English let off another burp of death and that was about all that Davepeta could do for her. They watched helpless as their friend fell farther away eventually disappearing into the...light?? They blinked. There was light at the end of tunnel. This black hole did go somewhere after all. Davepeta felt a surge of hope and then plunged back into despair. If there was somewhere at the end of this then they had failed. Their sacrifice would be for nothing! Once they landed English would be free again and then he would destroy more realities and more everything and... Hold on, hadn't he done that already? How much more of everything was left to destroy? Nothing! Where the furk was this light coming from? They didn't have to wonder for long as suddenly they were at the light and through it into...clouds? There clouds hurling past them as they streaked across what seemed to be an honest to goodness sky. Davepeta winced as they looked up and to see there was even a sun the source of the light they had all been heading toward but didn't realize was there.  
      The wind rushing passed them gave the sprite another realization. They were somehow slowing down as they fell, how that was possible Davepeta couldn't guess but it might have something to do with how they were back with the normal laws of physics again. They had to slow down now to match terminal velocity. Man, green sun black holes were confusing! The sprite didn't see any sign of the tunnel they had come through as the scanned the heavens. They just appeared here and now that was that. A few of their stray feathers floated past their sight and glancing down Davepeta noticed that the ground was slowly coming up to meet them and something else as well, waiting for them. Standing there as though she had all the time in the world was Jade, the very same Jade they had seen fall past in the wormhole. Their eyes met and even through their orange and green shades (that should have this entire universe embedded on it now that they fell through a black hole but didn't because they were already had another universe imprinted on them) Davepeta could see the dark pupilless eyes of the dead cherub staring back at them.  
      They were not sure what to do. Should they see this whale beached and stand over them in triumph for the prize that Captain Ahab could never catch? A great big fish sounded good to them right now. Or maybe they should leave English in the care of his sister/Jade. It was then that Davepeta was given a sign. It had to be Jade infusing the dead cherub because there was no way that Calliope lifted up a hand and gave the sprite a thumbs up. That was all the encouragement they needed. With one last quick movement, Davepeta unsheathed themselves from the vile monster and gave him a quick kick to the head, one last roar emanating from him. They tried to give a return thumbs up to Jade/Calliope but it was about that time when all energy cost came and an angry collection officer in their brain was banging on their doors demanding to know why their utilities hadn’t been paid in three months. Davepeta was spent. Dimly, not even able to make sure that English finally met his end, they fell backward in the air throwing them into an unintended somersault. Their wings spread out, one trailing feathers across the sky like some bird comet. Their vision dimmed and the last thing they saw was a building that they were headed to. If they didn't know better, it could have been the very same one as Dave's old apartment building back on Earth. Well, there is no place like home they guess. One of their homes. That was a nice thought, being able to call many places home. Davepeta sailed onto the roof smacking it hard like a concrete belly flop. They passed the fuck out. It would be awhile before they woke up again.


End file.
